Day 290 - Puke Trip

Thanksgiving was great.

The trip back was not.

I first puked outside the airport.

And then I puked in the airport restroom.

A drunk douche sat next to me for the second part of the flight.

He wanted to talk.

He didn't understand that I didn't want to talk.

He called me grouchy.

I ignored him.

The shuttle was fine.

I am home and Barbar is happy.

More later.

Day 289 - Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

I go home to Chicago in less than two days!

Day 287 -Woo Woo!

I'm in a good mood because I have cranked out work today.

I also got my Thanksgiving schedule approved by my boss, one that I came up with so am 100% OK with it.

And now I am enjoying some Harry Potter on TV and about to start my packing list for Thanksgiving in Chicago!

For your enjoyment, a conversation I had with the Brit:

Me: Do you like artichokes?

Brit: Yeah, there are few foods I don't like. Like Whoppers.

Me: (gasp)

Brit: What? I don't like the malt taste.

Me: Oh, phew. I thought you meant the burger Whopper. I was like "Dealbreaker."

Brit: What? No, that's like saying "I don't like life."

Day 205 - Don't Be Mad

I know I've been absent, but I've been trying to get a ton of work done and just when I thought I was ahead, a very important thing came up that I now have to finish. It's not stressful because I know I will be able to do everything, but it takes time.

Plus I am leaving tomorrow for Chicago! I'm going home to see oldest sister's comedy show. So excited!

Promise I will talk to you when I have time (read: when I return to L.A. and maybe not for a few days after that).

You still love me?

Good.

Day 204 - Friday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yay! I'm so freaking excited it's Friday!

Sure, every Friday is exciting, but I feel extra happy about this one because I wasn't able to do anything last weekend.

No big plans or anything, but it's Friday!! And it's so sunny!!

Oh, actually, small plans today: Neighbor and I are going to the Bat Caves. Later this afternoon, I believe.

Who knows what else I'll do this weekend. Maybe some writing, maybe go to Target for the other curtain I need. Maybe some packing for Chicago!!

Friday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Day 200 - Whoa, I Need A Life!

I've written 200 of these little things?! Holy Moly!

So, I guess that means an update on whatever this blog is supposed to be about. Oh right, making my life like a TV show. What a weirdo.

1. Apartment: Still love my apartment and I actually put up a curtain on my closet that I've been meaning to do since sometime last summer. Oops. And I think I've found sheets for my bed, finally! Oh, but a baby moved in next door and its room is next to mine. It cries and it's unfair that I should have to deal with this.

2. Hair and Makeup: I'm so freaking weird. Well, I got my haircut and found a hair place that I love. Makeup is good. This is such a weird goal. Maybe that means I'm growing up??

3. Clothes: Love all my clothes and happy with all recent purchases. Still need to find skinny jeans. (Old Navy still does not have the right size online in stock for me. :( )

4. Job: Am I doing my dream job? No. Am I working? Yes. I really need to be writing and pitching what I want to do. I fell behind at one point and am now about to get back on track. Wish me luck!

5. Money: I'm actually OK on money. I was even able to buy a new laptop (Melvin), thanks to a tax refund. I'm getting there and swear I am trying to be smart about my funds. Trying...

6. Organization: Uh, do we have to talk about this? I've kind of forgotten about it. Maybe I should focus on this. I have been thinking a lot about getting my portfolio together. Thinking is just thinking though.

7. Zany Situations: I think Legal Eagle and I will be going on a Hollywood tour after I go back to Chicago. I owe her because I lost a bet. This will be zany. I'm excited!

8. Boys: Well, at least there is a boy in the picture. And Neighbor is calling me tonight. About time!

9. A "Hang-Out" Place: I do have my little Cafe Audrey and some other places I adore. This doesn't feel too, too important, but I am enjoying when I go out. That's good!

All in all, I'm in a good place right now. Just need to get a little bit back on track with work.

Day 158 - New Year's Resolutions

Holy crap! I made New Year's resolutions on here last year. They were pretty lame and I maybe kind of accomplished some of them. I do want to make resolutions this year, but I've made them smaller and more general. I think so far so good and I will be one of those people who actually does them!

1. Dress like a French ballerina - I need a "style" I think instead of a mish-mash closet. Plus I want to wear tutu skirts and leotards and long sweater wraps.

2. Take on a new hobby - I want to take ballet classes (originally inspired by the clothing), but it would also help my flexibility (the one athletic area I never was good at) and my posture. Plus, I KNOW it would be a challenge and it'd be nice to take on a sport/activity that is really difficult for me.

3. Make more connections in my industry - This is obvious. But...I am already getting ahead on this and planning lunch/coffee with one of the other writers I met in NY who is from LA. Go me!

4. Clean out closet, makeup, shoes, jewelry - This will be easy as I plan on doing it right after New Year's. Just need to scrap things taking up space.

5. Save money for next Christmas - My family wants to vacation next year, so I am going to do my part and save!

6. Redo bedding and complete bedroom - I already have a plan for my bedding and bedroom, but it is still unfinished (since March!).

7. Finally get a damn portfolio - Yes, this was a resolution last year, so here it is again.

8. Find "my drink" - I usually skip around on what drinks I drink, but I want to find a drink I love and make it my normal order.

9. Do something I am afraid of - Pretty general, but I want to do more things that I are maybe out of my comfort zone, like attend an event alone, set up a lunch with an editor I've freelanced with, anything.

10. Find a boyfriend - Haha...that's not really one! But I will meet more guys!

Soooo...I guess those are the resolutions. I'll probably forget about them or something right away. But on another note, I am back in an good mood about New Year's. Actually, I am a little under-the-weather (maybe from the temp change from Chicago to LA?), but I am taking tea and medicine and resting. San Diego, see you tomorrow!!!

Day 109 - DOOMSDAY!!!

It's here!! Tomorrow at 4:15 am, Legal Eagle and I are being picked up by a shuttle to head to Chicago and Iowa for BRIDEBRAIN'S WEDDING!!

First, we fly into Chicago and stay with my family (and mooch off of them) and then we drive to Iowa for the wedding...and eventually drive back to Chicago to fly back to L.A.

I'm pretty excited. Mostly because I get to see my family and haven't seen them since February! It'll be nice to get out of California and sort of regroup. Also excited because I love flying and airports in general and always better when traveling with someone (even if LE hates flying and makes me stay awake the whole time).

And I must say I am slightly excited about the wedding, not because of the wedding, but because I know LE and I will make it hilarious and will stick out like sore thumbs. I predict we come home with many stories and even more pictures.

To hold you over until I return from my trip, here is a picture of the shoes I will be wearing:


^Silver, which is lame, but LE and I thought they looked a little gladiator-ish, so we thought that made them cooler. My mom confirmed this thought without me having to mention it, so I'm a bit more sold on them then I was at first.

Day 68 - Too Little Time

Legal Eagle and I are moving really soon! Yikes!

I went back to Chicago for my dad’s birthday and it was soooooo much fun!

Barbar is the same.

I want to be a dog walker and a housesitter.

I have no time for anything.

Must be better at scheduling my life.

Is it March 1st yet?

Day 61 - It's Been Far Too Long!

I’m baaack!

I don’t even know where to begin.

Well, I’ll start with something that is becoming very WILAY: I am working at home currently (and about to get paid!) and LE is going to start working from home too! We’re going to have coffee breaks even…yay!

And we’re going to move our desks into the dining room/kitchen-y area, so that it is more work-y (as opposed to having my desk by my bed where I am often tempted to just roll from my chair to my bed to nap).

I went home to Chicago for Christmas and had a blast. It was cold and icy, but Martini welcomed me with open arms. He was really great. Oh and I went to this lounge where the vodka tonics were $9! Insane!

New Years was also lovely. We hadn’t planned to do anything and then went out with a group and had such a good tme.

It’s so very chilly here and I’m ready for beach weather to be back. Also, haven’t heard from Bride Brain in a while. Maybe it’s time to send her an email?

I so had something I was going to write, but now it is completely forgotten.

Oh, I heard from The Doc during my flight back to California (while in Vegas where I was stuck for four hours after just barely making my Chicago flight out). Pretty random. We’ll see.

On a sad note: Jennifer Love Hewitt and her fiance have broken up. I was really hoping she had really found The One this time. No, I’m not being sarcastic. Poor girl.

More later!

Oh, I remembered. I was going to write about Ageless Dan. Ahh…went to my mom’s work Xmas party. Met Ageless Dan, who barely said hi to me, but immediately asked, “Where’s (middle sister)?”

Note: Middle sister used to work at my mom’s place so she knows people there.

OK, so that’s fine, but then my mom told me how he always asks about her. So, we concluded that he loves her or something and teased her all week about it.

Then, when my mom got back to work, she informed me that that day he asked about me and called me a cutie and said she could give me his number! And she didn’t even think he was joking!

Well, I was confused by this, so I have now concluded that it doesn’t matter which of me or my sisters he dates, he is really after having my mom as his mother-in-law. Weird, but she does make good cookies!

Day 60 - I Want To Play The Sunglasses Too!

Happy December!!! 18 days until I am in Chicago!!! So many exclamation points!!!

Thanksgiving was splendid. Ate, drank, watched the parade, dog show and Cowboys game.

I’m not much of a football girl, but the Cowboys’ games are entertaining with Legal Eagle and always bring up good conversations.

Football announcer: …especially with this being such a tough time for them (Seattle’s team).

Me: Tough time? What happened?

LE: They suck.

Me: Oh, so like no one died? It’s only a tough time if someone is dying or dead.

LE: Yeah, or if like your whole team gets…

Me: …the flu?

LE: (makes a face that lets me know this is not acceptable).

Me: …herpes?

LE: Hmm…yeah.

But even better than this rivoting conversation was one that we had a bit ago when we were watching the AMAs and Kayne West was talking.

He was accepting an award and then said how he wants to be like The Beatles and Elvis, blah blah.

LE: Oh my god. He can’t even say that. He’s so stupid!

Me: Yeah, and it’s not even comparable because he’s a rapper and they weren’t.

LE: Oh, oh! And most of the old rockers played instruments. What’s he play….the sunglasses?

I just about died when LE said this and I’ve been laughing ever since. He’s always wearing those stupid sunglasses. I hate them so.

And LE and I watched a show that I got from one of my jobs, some Australian show, but in an episode the character says something about being racist towards redheads. It’s beyond funny, considering LE’s explanation of redheads not too long ago.

And finally, Barbar has a new name. It’s Super Tramp. Long story, LE said Barbar was like Tramp in Lady and the Tramp, so now we call him Super Tramp. He quite likes it and has all this attitude now. I don’t know what I am going to do with him…absolute trouble!

Day 53 - Little Weird Things

There is a guy outside my window (not directly, but on the landing nearby) who just carried a bike up the stairs and is now making noises typically made by cars. It’s hard to describe, but I hope he doesn’t pass out because I am not a good enough person to give him mouth-to-mouth.

Now I really am volunteering this Sunday. Should be interesting. But at least it is in Santa Monica, so maybe Legal Eagle and I can grab a bite or a drink up there afterward. Yes, I need there to be something in it for me in order to volunteer.

I killed mine and LE’s tree Barkley, but now I am bringing him back to life. Note: I have killed him once before this and brought him back to life, so here we go again.

LE and I made some amazing twice-baked stuffed potatoes yesterday. I could have lived in it.

I am going back to Chicago in officially less than two months. So weird. And so cold. But so pretty exciting.

I haven’t bought any new clothes in forever! (My forever may be a lot shorter than others, but that makes no difference). I haven’t even bought a cheapo Target dress.

I should really go wash a dish or two, but all I want to do is take a nap.

I see the stray cats less and less lately. It’s very sad and I’m not sure what to make of it. However, I see annoying Scurvy Cat everyday. He is here, outside our door, meowing without fail.

I love and hate the show Stylista and it’s on tonight! I soooo can’t wait! It drives me crazy!

Day 44 - And My Boyfriend Is...

A Surfer!

Legal Eagle wrote our little email to Bride Brain about our boyfriends and whatnot. Apparently they are both surfers who live near the beach and like a block away from each other!



^ Are you my boyfriend?

And when I thought LE was taking it too far making them both surfers, she responded oh-so-wisely:

Well, come on, everyone out here is a surfer.

So, we didn’t give them names or anything, but apparently we have been dating them for a while, oh and Mom and Dad, you already met them both and adore them. Yeah, we’ve even brought our parents into this!

I’m just happy to have all this documented in email because I have the worst time sticking to lies and remembering stories.

In fabulous other news, my review of Californication is one of the top stories on Buzzine. Go me!

California is quite hot right now, 80s or so, but I here Chicago is quite chilly. Let’s just hope it doesn’t snow there anytime soon!!

Day 15 - Timing?

I’ve heard for about the last many months of my job search that it is all about timing and I just have to wait and it’ll all come together at the right time.

Well, I now completely and utterly hate hearing this. The timing is right now, go ahead and check my bank account if you aren’t sure.

And I’m not really sure why people say this, but I suspect it’s because there isn’t much else to say when you have gone on 5 million interviews without one turning out right.

However, as I am preparing for my sisters’ arrivals to California (oh and Martini), I figure timing must be playing into it right now. I mean, if I had gotten a job in the last few weeks, what would I have done about their visits? Already ask for time off? Or make them find their way around LA without me?

So, I’m going to tell myself one last time that it is all about timing and now just isn’t right. But, as soon as they are on a plane back to Chicago, I better have some serious prospects.

Here’s to timing!



^ If timing can work out for them, then it can work out for me!

Oh, and Lauren “Lo” Bosworth is also unemployed and looking for work, so I am going to consider us in the same boat…although hers is probably a lot nicer.

Link to “Lo” being in my boat.

Day 12 - Bikes Lost Forever

I had no idea if I was going to write today, but then some funny little stories all came together about bikes.

My oldest sister had her bike stolen in a way last year…well, it sort of disappeared and we thought we knew where it went, but it was all very confusing. However, this is not the point. Today I received a call from her saying she thinks she saw her bike. Although she wasn’t sure and was trying to get a closer look, I have reason to believe her. Her bike was maroon and kind of that old style of bikes (which is not common to see in Chicago).

So she isn’t sure it was hers, but how out of a movie is that - so oddly poetic. You know, some little artsy movie where she sees her long-lost bike and all these memories come flooding back.

Well, for me only one memory came back. When I was much younger, my dad and maybe my sisters and I went riding and my dad was riding the maroon bike and I remember him getting heckled by some little teenage boys who thought the bike looked funny or looked like a girl’s bike. I doubt anyone else remembers this, but for some reason it is the only thing that bike reminds me of.

Told Legal Eagle about my sister’s bike, which then brought up her own bike story. When she was younger her bike was stolen and then about 2 weeks later they found it in a dumpster.



^ This is the closest thing I could find to a bike in a dumpster…I do like that it is a little girl’s bike, although it doesn’t quite fit the image LE has set in my mind. And now I am wondering if she took the bike out of the dumpster or if it was a lost cause…will ask later.

The final bike story is the best, although right now I am having a bit of trouble remembering all the details. When my dad was little he used to ride his bike to school. One day it was stolen. Not funny yet? Well, his house was only about a block away from school and yes, he rode to and from every day. We once drove past his school and old house on a family trip where he recounted this story. I’m pretty sure he still misses that bike. And if you were to ever see a picture of my dad when he was little, this story gets even funnier because he quite simply looked like a funny, little kid.

While Holly and Val don’t have any stolen bike stories, Holly did get Val’s car towed once and had to lie and say it was stolen. Although at the time I think she thought it was stolen and then later they find out that it was towed.



However, this is one of the episodes I am not crazy about. Mostly because Henry is in it and I was never a huge fan of his. In fact, the Henry episodes are probably some of the worst (if it’s possible for this show to have bad episodes).

Completely different note: Kara Saun from one of the Project Runway seasons was a costume designer for WILAY during the last seasons, which makes total sense if you think about Holly and Val’s clothes. Think about it!